I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
