I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize