He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
