i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
