Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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