I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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