Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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