how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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