Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
