You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
