i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
