I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize
