Don't make out with my wife yet
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I love having hate sex.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
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