I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize