why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
