Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
