Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
