they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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