Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
