She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize