To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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