I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize