I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
