This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
