I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
