You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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