Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
