Are we in a gay sports bar?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize