Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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