Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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