Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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