some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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