Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize