your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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