that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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