No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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