a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
