new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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