Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
