Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Randomize
