Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
