My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize