Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
