girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
