If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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