We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize