We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize