This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize