i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just google imaged poop.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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