Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
