This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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